Christmas Can be a Hard Time for Revert Muslims

Here’s why…

Christmas can be a really difficult period for revert Muslims for many reasons. Some reverts have been completely disowned by their family and this period only reminds them of that and makes it hurt all the more.

For other reverts, their relationship with their family is strained. Spending time with their family at Christmas can be a crucial way of maintaining ties. Many reverts may continue to celebrate with their family by spending time with them and giving gifts.

A lot of people here in this country celebrate Christmas in a purely cultural form and is primarily about family being together. If reverts tell their families they cannot do this with them anymore, they can be met by hurt and misunderstanding; making the relationship extremely strained or even worse.

Being constantly scolded by Muslims for spending time with family at Christmas does not help. It’s very easy to say to someone ‘you can’t celebrate Christmas, it’s haram’ but you can’t possibly understand the situation from their point of view.

Can you imagine ostracising yourself from your own family when they are all coming together. Some families only do this once a year. Can you imagine what that feels like or what it would feel like for your family to have that done to them, for a reason they can’t understand?

Just because our families are not Muslim, it does not mean that they mean any less to us.

If you know any reverts, please just spare a thought, a prayer, a portion of your sympathy or a moment of your time for them during this period rather than a harsh tongue.



  1. I can feel what you are saying, just say to your nafs, that what you are doing is what Prophet Muhammad Peace Be Upon Him has done.

    And you will have the reward of this patience and sabr in the life after. And make duaa that this family revert soon Insh a Allah.

    I was listening to a sermon of a scholar whose parents are still Christian. And he was crying like a baby, he wanted his parents to come out from Hell fire, but he can’t do it.

    So it’s great sabr to you guys!!!

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I’m so sorry for this hard position you’re in. Remember, you never have to please people. The only who can judge us is Allah and He is the most understanding and forgiving 🙂 even if no one else knows, He knows the tight spot you’re in.
    Also, do not abandon your family even if the relations are strained. As muslims a very big priority is make our parents happy 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

    • Yeah of course that’s the biggest comfort that Allah understands and He is the only one who does.. definitely that was my main point that the intentions is always to keep good relationships especially with parents ☺️

      Liked by 1 person

  3. It is a very hard position to be in I’m sure. But while you have to maintain family ties, try to slowly seperate yourself from the Christmas customs.

    For example, if your family would get really offended if you don’t get them gifts, and you feel you have to… Then do it but make sure u dont write anything about Christmas on it like merry Christmas etc… And then try to give it a few days before or after and not on that actual day.

    As for spending time with your family, it is important. Only distance yourself from the celebration as much as u can. So visit them but don’t wish everyone a happy Christmas if you can get away with it, don’t join them when… they sing carols? Or whatever else they do on Christmas… Try to behave as you would on any other visit and avoid All Christmas rituals as much as you can.

    And of course make dua. There’s no better solution ♥.
    May Allah make it easy for all the Muslims out there…

    Liked by 6 people

    • Aww yeah I do all of those things actually, it does take time in some things and subtlety in others… I mainly wanted to raise awareness so that some Muslims can be mindful and maybe considerate of this aspect of they were not already.
      Yes of course du’a always! Ameen ajma’in ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m sure it really would be a hard time. 😦 Prayers for everyone. ❤
    I think that for Non Muslim families who have relatives who are Muslim and they are distant or the relationship is not as before, Christmas should be a good time to be all happy and connected right?

    Gifts are beautiful things, they make more room for love and appreciation. ❤ And I'm sure you're better at wrapping gifts than I am.
    Some of us really might not understand the situation but all of us know that family is important and having parents pleased with you also. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. You write “Christmas can be a really difficult period for revert Muslims for many reasons.” But do you know it is also a very encumbering period for christians?

    In the world we can see that the majority of Christians do fall in the trap of the capitalist world with its pagan feasts. Lots of Christians do not mind to take part in the heathen festival and honouring a false god instead of seeing that the prophet Jeshua, the sent one form God was born in October so why celebrate his birth in December on the feast of the god of light? and what have Santa, reindeer and fur trees to do with the Nazarene man who was born in Bethlehem, where no such things are?

    Real Christians who worship only One true God, Allah the Elohim Hashem Jehovah, Who is One and not two or three, like other believers of the One true God of Israel, the God of Abraham, should not be afraid to have a nice family time in those dark days of the Christmas period. The only thing which they should take care of is that they do not intermingle the pagan symbols with their time of being together in peace and friendship.

    And when people want to exchange gifts there should be nothing against it when they are honest and the presenter of the gift is recognised as such and not lies are told that it would come from fairies or a Santa.

    Being together and spending a lovely time with each other is nothing Allah would be against, so let us be thankful to Him that we can have such glorious time with each other in peace.


  6. I agree about how we treat other Muslims concerning emotional situations. Most unfavorable behavior is due to lack of knowledge on how to behave righteously. Before we look @ the conduct of others, we must first check ourselves, & recheck & keep checking till we die. AllahSWT, deals w/each of us (I.e. all of His Servants, human as well as animal), according to the individual. Allah & only Allah (The God), knows the hearts, minds & intentions. And He is The Oft Forgiving, The Most Merciful. He forgave & granted paradise to a prostitute for giving a thirsty dog water. He not only forgave, but moved the dimensions of the earth so that The Angels of mercy got the soul of a man rather than The Angels of punishment, this man killed 99 times, but he was seeking & strived for repentance. Yet, a woman was torchured in her grave by a cat because she had a cat, kept it locked up till it starved to death. (Ref: Bukhari). AllahSWT (The God), judges & forgives whom He Pleases because we r judged by our intentions & Allah Himself said that man was created weak. (Allah wishes to lighten (the burden) for you; & man was created weak. TheHolyQur’an 4:28) Prophet Muhammad was a kind, soft hearted, loving Prophet. But even The Prophets had different personalities & were dealt w/differently by The God, according to who they were. But they all conveyed their message, but what were they all commanded by The God? To convey w/kindness, to be mild. Pharaoh was the worst human mentioned, he thought he was god, not “a god” but “god” & he was a tyrant. Yet, what did Allah command Prophet Moses? “And speak to him mildly, perhaps he may accept admonition or fear Allah.” (TheHolyQur’an 20:44). If this command was given to a Prophet, who loved & feared The God more than any of us can imagine, & it was about a tyrant, ummmm? How much more do u think we should deal kindly w/each other & the rest of mankind & the animals? For, to my knowledge, there is not another pharaoh around. Even if there were, we would still have to deal w/him kindly. Muslims, knowledge is power & it is what saves souls. Non Muslims, knowledge is power, it is what saves from hatred, prejudice, & blind following of misconceptions about others.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Asalaamu aleykum sister. I married a revert and we have the same issues every Christmas. Regardless of their belief, they are still your family. Islam forbids us from breaking the family bond. Christmas is also more cultural than a religious celebration for some families and is tied with childhood memories (at least for my husband). So I make turkey (halal) and all the trimmings (halal/kosher), mince pies and buy suitable for vegetarian Christmas puddings. We wear silly hats and pull crackers but draw the line at carol singing and midnight mass. It’s all about intention (niya). We are not going to Church, worshipping or praying to the trinity. We are solid in our belief in Allah. We are sharing in with the festivities. Just minus the religious aspect.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Walaykum assalam sister. Exactly you’re right the main priority is about maintaining strong family ties. None of my family are religious at all so Christmas is always about family traditions and spending quality time so like you say it’s all about the niya. It’s nice to hear that within your family you have your own ways of incorporating in order to keep that family bond. Barakallahu feeki sister.


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