A Heartbeat of Panic

In a heartbeat of panic there are many things that happen.

First of all, time lets go of itself and therefore walks away from the line it’s supposed to follow. In your mind hours could pass while outside it has been mere milliseconds.

Your heart pulsates so loudly, you feel each pump in every atom of your body. You feel the beating loudest in your chest and yet you are sure that you feel your heart in your throat.

All of the worst scenarios are forcing themselves into your mind. Each one as heartbreaking and traumatic as the one that came before it and each one convincing you that it is a real possibility.

These scenarios would never even occur to you in a normal state of mind; they would be unfathomable yet now they seem to be inevitable and real outcomes.

A voice of hope tries to give you a more desirable scenario to contemplate but you show it the door before you let yourself believe.

All of your reason has disappeared.

All of your senses have abandoned you.

And all you are left with is panic and fear.

And so it goes on, a stretched and arduous torture lasting an eternity in your mind.

It seems that your worst nightmares will soon become the next chapter of your life.

Until finally, you find that all of your scenarios were wrong and in fact all is well. Better than well, all is amazing compared to the abyss your imagination had created. Relief floods in instantly, too quickly, making you feel dizzy and you find a laugh; something you thought you wouldn’t do again.

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